We live in times where pervertion of marriage is rampant. Love is reduced to mere feelings and unabated sexual intercourse, both inside of marriage and outside of marriage. The concept of a covenant love is foreign to most of the world, and even within the so called evangelical church. No wonder that relationships are too shallow and can't withstand great trials. Instead, in just a whim, marriages are broken and their main reason was "irreconcilable differences". Here are some pratical pointers to help couples strengthen their marriages and also the rest to have a high view of biblical marriage and covenant love. 1. Wife... Submission of wife to her husband is not a blind submission. Submission to your husband is likened only to the submission of the church to Christ. Take note of that little word "as". It doesn't mean that they are the same in all respect. Your husband is not Christ. Your husband is not infallible. He is a sinner like you. Which also means, patience towards your spouse is necessary. If your husband is asking you to do something that is against the head of the church, our Lord Jesus Christ, obey Jesus without usurping your husband's authority. With gentleness and patience, tell him that you belong to Christ ultimately, and not to him. Our body parts follow what our heads will. It is not the hand that dictates to the head to move. It is the other way around. However, when a body part is not functioning the way it should be, it means one of two things, either the head is not functioning right or it's the body that is not functioning right. Submit to your husband because the head saves the body. The head will tell the body if the water is hot or the weather is cold. So long as your husband functions the way he should be by God's design, follow him in everything. Christ's Church will persevere to the end, so should you also wives, persevere with your husbands. 2. Husband... Love your wife in such a way that she will be sanctified, without blemish, taken care of, just as Christ loved the church. A biblical and right way of loving ourselves is by loving others Christ loved his body, and the members of his body are those who are united with him. Husband love your wife because she is your body as she is united with you. Christ will never leave nor forsake his church, so should we husbands to our wives. 3. Marriage is momentary, Christ and the Church is not Marriage is likened unto Christ and his church not the other way around. Distortion of marriage is an evidence of a distorted view of creation and the Gospel(new creation). Christ dying for his church is not an after thought in the mind of God.
Main point summary
Marriage is to be modeled after Christ and his Church
z Wives, a submit to your own husbands, b as to the Lord.
31 Wives, submit 32 to your husbands
αἱ γυναῖκες τοῖς ἰδίοις ἀνδράσιν
as to the Lord,
ὡς τῷ κυρίῳ,
For c the husband is the head of the wife even as d Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is e himself its Savior.
because the husband is the head of the wife
ὅτι ἀνήρ ἐστιν κεφαλὴ τῆς γυναικὸς
as also Christ is the head of the church -
ὡς καὶ ὁ Χριστὸς κεφαλὴ τῆς ἐκκλησίας,
he himself being the savior of the body.
αὐτὸς σωτὴρ τοῦ σώματος•
Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit f in everything to their husbands.
But as the church submits to Christ,
ἀλλʼ ὡς ἡ ἐκκλησία ὑποτάσσεται τῷ Χριστῷ,
so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
οὕτως καὶ αἱ γυναῖκες τοῖς ἀνδράσιν ἐν παντί.
g Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and h gave himself up for her,
Husbands, love your 33 wives
Οἱ ἄνδρες, ἀγαπᾶτε τὰς γυναῖκας,
just as Christ loved the church
καθὼς καὶ ὁ Χριστὸς ἠγάπησεν τὴν ἐκκλησίαν
and gave himself for her
καὶ ἑαυτὸν παρέδωκεν ὑπὲρ αὐτῆς,
that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by i the washing of water j with the word,
to sanctify her
ἵνα αὐτὴν ἁγιάσῃ
by cleansing her 34 with the washing of the water by the word,
καθαρίσας τῷ λουτρῷ τοῦ ὕδατος ἐν ῥήματι,
so k that he might present the church to himself in splendor, l without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 1
so that he 35 may present the church to himself as glorious -
ἵνα παραστήσῃ αὐτὸς ἑαυτῷ ἔνδοξον τὴν ἐκκλησίαν,
not having a stain or wrinkle, or any such blemish,
μὴ ἔχουσαν σπίλον ἢ ῥυτίδα ἤ τι τῶν τοιούτων,
but holy and blameless. 36
ἀλλʼ ἵνα ᾖ ἁγία καὶ ἄμωμος.
In the same way m husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.
In the same way 37 husbands ought to love their wives
οὕτως ὀφείλουσιν [καὶ] οἱ ἄνδρες ἀγαπᾶν τὰς ἑαυτῶν γυναῖκας
as their own bodies.
ὡς τὰ ἑαυτῶν σώματα.
He who loves his wife loves himself.
ὁ ἀγαπῶν τὴν ἑαυτοῦ γυναῖκα ἑαυτὸν ἀγαπᾷ.
For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church,
For no one has ever hated his own body 38
Οὐδεὶς γάρ ποτε τὴν ἑαυτοῦ σάρκα ἐμίσησεν
but he feeds it and takes care of it,
ἀλλʼ ἐκτρέφει καὶ θάλπει αὐτήν,
just as Christ also does the church,
καθὼς καὶ ὁ Χριστὸς τὴν ἐκκλησίαν,
because n we are members of his body.
for we are members of his body. 39
ὅτι μέλη ἐσμὲν τοῦ σώματος αὐτοῦ.
o “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and p the two shall become one flesh.”
For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and will be joined to his wife, and the two will become 40 one flesh. 41
ἀντὶ τούτου καταλείψει ἄνθρωπος [τὸν] πατέρα καὶ [τὴν] μητέρα καὶ προσκολληθήσεται πρὸς τὴν γυναῖκα αὐτοῦ, καὶ ἔσονται οἱ δύο εἰς σάρκα μίαν.
This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.
This mystery is great - but I am actually 42 speaking with reference to Christ and the church.
τὸ μυστήριον τοῦτο μέγα ἐστίν• ἐγὼ δὲ λέγω εἰς Χριστὸν καὶ εἰς τὴν ἐκκλησίαν.
However, q let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she r respects her husband.
Nevertheless, 43 each one of you must also love his own wife as he loves himself, 44 and the wife must 45 respect 46 her husband.
πλὴν καὶ ὑμεῖς οἱ καθʼ ἕνα, ἕκαστος τὴν ἑαυτοῦ γυναῖκα οὕτως ἀγαπάτω ὡς ἑαυτόν, ἡ δὲ γυνὴ ἵνα φοβῆται τὸν ἄνδρα.
Loving our own bodies is not a sin in of itself. Neither loving one's own life. In fact the scripture assumes that we do love our lives and bodies. It doesn't command us to love ourselves(because we're doing this already), nor does the scripture forbids it. Loving one's life and body is not the same as selfishness. It is self-love apart from loving God first and loving others is selfishness. When Christ said in John 12:25 "Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life.", he is not saying not to love your life at all, but that we should not love our lives the way the world does. The reason I say that is because of the result and motivation for not loving our lives in this world, namely eternal life. Is wanting eternal life not loving one's life? In other words, we're just merely exchanging it for something better. So when the scripture said that we should love one another as we love ourselves, husbands love your wives as you love your own bodies, and love is not self seeking, it is not telling us to disregard ourselves, but that we should first and foremost love others without any pretense, not taking advantage of them, not abusing them. Christ does not abuse, mistreat, and hate his own body(the church), so do you of your own body, therefore don't abuse, mistreat and hate others, but instead love them.